Self-care Therapy 

Our therapists can help you understand what boundaries are and how to set them in a healthy way.

If you grew up with a parent or family member with addiction or mental illness, you likely spent your childhood trying very hard to make sure your mom, dad, grandparent, or other caregiver was in a good mood. You developed an extremely sensitive antenna and if you picked up any sign of something wrong, you tried to do whatever is necessary to FIX it.

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The following illustrates the issue:

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While driving the hour across town for the hundredth time to be there for her sister with alcoholism, a woman is so frazzled from the long day that she doesn’t brake in time and gets into a fender bender. She has some pain in their back from the impact but instead of going to the doctor, she gets back in the car and rushes to her sister only to discover she is just drunk again and too incoherent to acknowledge what this woman has done to be by her side.

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This woman is left with empty feelings while trying to fulfill the physical and emotional needs of her sister. She feels like whatever she does it’s never enough. People might say to this woman that she is “unselfish” for everything she does for her sister. But this is where it gets confusing - she is stressed out all the time by trying to be helpful and caring at the expense of her own mental and physical health.

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If this sounds familiar, perhaps you avoid conflict with the people in your life. You don’t express how you really feel. You are afraid that speaking up would make you seem “difficult” or “selfish.” You are unable to say "no."

To make matters worse, the reason you don’t express yourself is because you may not actually know how you feel or what you want.

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It is not unusual for a person to seek therapy because they are ready to change this pattern and set boundaries yet they don’t know how. The therapists in at Los Feliz Psychotherapy are experts in helping you understand what boundaries are and how to set them in a healthy way. We can help you better understand what it is that you really want and how to ask for what you want from others in a kind and compassionate way.

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In short, we can help you change this pattern for good.